She raises her hands to my chest again and then tickles my stomach as her fingertips gently slide down to my jeans. Or maybe that’s just my own wishful thinking. She’s breathing heavy, like she’s excited, anticipating what’s coming next - waiting and hoping. Her eyes have that hopeful sparkle that I’ve missed so much. Her mouth is small, with just a hint of humor at the corners. Her hands hang to her sides, flat against the sheetrock. She’s leaning against the wall near the stairs, waiting in the shadows. I smile at the omen as I splash through the puddles, the water cool against my toes, and, like the air, follow her inside. A shiver runs down my spine as the sun’s heat falls upon on my face, chest and shoulders. I look up at the clearing clouds and close my eyes against the brightness of the emerging sun. I’ll hang my hat on to that for now and wait - all things in their own time. I think she meant that truth eventually wins out in the end. We’re both still hiding secrets and I’m sick and tired of it, but something I remember my mom saying is that everything has it’s time in the sun. It reminds me of being a kid, long ago, before everything turned to shit. The same breeze that teased at Tonya’s hair has picked up and I take in the fresh smell of the morning rain and a newly cut lawn from somewhere across the railroad tracks. I glance up at the sky and then around the parking lot, replaying how things ended with Shauna just a short time ago, and then the closeness that Tonya and me shared this morning. I think she must and that feels good too. I stare at her, mesmerized, until she disappears inside the Garage, never looking back.ĭoes she know that I’m watching the graceful shift of every curve, the way her hair drifts in the breeze, the ripples left behind with each step in the rain-water puddles - the way the very air follows her? I wonder if she knows what that does to me. It’s something buried way down deep inside, and I’m pretty much an authority on burying shit. It’s not the way she looks in that t-shirt either. But she’s not like those other women who work so hard for attention by wearing revealing clothes and nightclub makeup, or the way they move and talk with practiced mannerisms. She’s just being herself, a weird combination of the girl I met two years ago and the new and improved Tonya. She slowly and almost deliberately places one small, bare foot in front of the other, reaching out with her toes and then she gently lowers her heel to the pavement. Her soaking-wet t-shirt clings to her lacy underwear and pale skin. She slides her hands off my chest and then without a word, turns and walks back across the parking lot. They have a penetrating, knowing look to them.Īll I can say for sure is that she’s fucking adorable. He big brown eyes catch the light and become luminous. She’s cocking her head to one side while her wet hair falls across her face, a wry twist of a smirk gracing those unforgettable lips.Ī stray beam of light finds her face and sparkles off the droplets on her cheeks and hair. ![]() Tonya is ignoring the rain, focusing on me as she looks up with that odd expression that I’ve never been able to figure out - a mixture of mischief, child-like glee and suspicion. Maybe this is what safety and forgiveness feels like, as if I’m finally home. ![]() And standing here in the parking lot of the Garage, in this moment, feeling her against me - all of the reasons for my rage and that driving need to isolate myself, protect myself - finally dissolve, washed away by the rain and Tonya’s embrace.Įven though it may be temporary and our future far from certain, I feel a peace that I haven’t known for years. The hot summer rain has faded to a light sprinkle and the sun is fighting through the early afternoon clouds, scattering random beams around the sky like the prelude to a rock concert.
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